Sigh II.

Growing up without my grandmother living in state wasn't too difficult. By the time she moved to North Carolina, I was off at college and still only saw her occasionally but I talked to her all the time. She was one of my inspirations, even through our tough times (there were times that we didn't speak at all, but every family has issues). I talked to her on the phone all the time, especially when she was ailing. When something began to bother me, I'd have to talk to her.

After she passed last year, it just didn't dawn on me. I was devastated after coming home post-graduation to help take care of her, and was locked away for quite sometime. It hurt; she was one of my best friends and I certainly got my fashion sense from her. After a while, though, it was like she was just was still in New York or I was still off at school -- especially with my hectic work schedule.

...until I just picked up the phone and involuntarily began dialing her number. It's been a crazy last few days. I think I'm going to have to take a brain-break from everything and just relax.